1. “Why is it that all cars are women?" he asked. "Because they're fussy and demanding," answered Zee.
"Because if they were men, they'd sit around and complain instead of getting the job done," I told him.”
2. “Money may not buy happiness, but I'd rather cry in a Jaguar than on a bus.”
3. “The problem with the designated driver program, it's not a desirable job, but if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun with it. At the end of the night, drop them off at the wrong house.”
4. “Always focus on the front windshield and not the review mirror.”
5. “Yes, heaven forbid I not be protected from tanks.”
6. “Take it easy driving– the life you save may be mine.
7. “I used to be a bumper sticker kind of writer. Now I’m more developed, and my writing often takes up whole bumpers. ”
8. “Vampires do breathe, by the way, but their chests don't move like humans'. Have you ever lain in the arms of your sweetheart and tried to match your breathing to his, or hers? You do it automatically. Your brain only gets involved if your body is having trouble. Fortunately there was nothing about this situation that was like being in the arms of a sweetheart except that I was leaning against someone's naked chest. I could no more have breathed with him than I could have ignited gasoline and shot exhaust out my butt because I was sitting in the passenger seat of a car.”
9. “Wait a minute. What did you just say? You're predicting $4-a-gallon gas? ... That's interesting. I hadn't heard that.”
10. “I’d been raised to be practical and keep my
emotions in check, but I loved cars. That was one of the few
legacies I’d picked up from my mom. She was a mechanic,
and some of my best childhood memories were of working
in the garage with her.”