1. “Another flaw in the human character is that everybody wants to build and nobody wants to do maintenance.”
2. "Humanists try to behave decently and honourably without any expectation of rewards or punishments in an afterlife. And, since the creator of the universe is to them unknowable so far, they serve as best can the highest abstraction of which they have some understanding, which is their community."
3. "We all see our lives as stories. If a person survives an ordinary span of sixty years or more, there is every chance that his or her life as a shapely story has ended, and all that remains to be experienced is epilogue. Life is not over, but the story is."
4. “Be careful what you pretend to be because you are what you pretend to be.”
5. "Maturity is a bitter disappointment for which no remedy exists, unless laughter can be said to remedy anything."
6. “We are healthy only to the extent that our ideas are humane.”
7. “The two real political parties in America are the Winners and the Losers. The people don't acknowledge this. They claim membership in two imaginary parties, the Republicans and the Democrats, instead.”
8. “I tell you, we are here on Earth to fart around, and don't let anybody tell you different.”
9. "Any reviewer who expresses rage and loathing for a novel is preposterous. He or she is like a person who has put on full armour and attacked a hot fudge sundae."
10. “Who is more to be pitied, a writer bound and gagged by policemen or one living in perfect freedom who has nothing more to say?